How We Can All Help Glass Children - Arc of Monroe (2024)

How We Can All Help Glass Children - Arc of Monroe (1)

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Glass Children

While doing research, I unearthed a video by Alicia Arenas, who calls herself a “Glass Child.” This term is brand new to me. Glass children are siblings of a person with a disability. The word glass means people tend to see right through them and focus only on the person with the disability. “Glass” is also used because the children appear strong, but in reality are not. These children have needs that are not being met.

I am not a glass child, but I know families with children who have intellectual or developmental disabilities. It is likely we all know families with this dynamic. In the video mentioned above, Alicia Arenas is talking about her traumatic experience growing up as one. For me, the video is impactful. Watch it here on YouTube: https://youtu.be/MSwqo-g2Tbk.

Alicia Arenas’ Experience as a Glass ChildHow We Can All Help Glass Children - Arc of Monroe (2)

What I find most eye-opening is how Alicia did not spend time alone with her parents until she was thirteen. Her childhood was filled with trauma for her abusive, disabled brother, along with the death of a younger sibling, and that she contemplated suicide at the young age of eleven. She did not have the outlet or resources to get the help she needed, and no one in the family, or outside the family, recognized her need.

Alicia stresses the importance of friends and family making sure to spend time with these vulnerable glass children. She compares these friends and family member to a one mile-per-hour wind; a force powerful enough to alter the trajectory of a bullet by 15 inches. For a glass child, having a force like that can change their lives forever.

We Can Help Glass Children

Alicia’s story helps me understand how important it is to focus on the child without the disability just as much as the one with the disability. How can we all help? If you are a parent of a glass child, spend quality alone time with them. If you are a friend or extended family, Invite that child over to your house for dinner, take them to a movie, ask them how they are, drive them to counseling, be their friend. The smallest gesture and make a world of difference for these children. We can all be that brief gust of calm for these glass children. Imagine the lasting positive effect you can have in a child’s life.

How We Can All Help Glass Children - Arc of Monroe (3) Alison Cundy is the former Engagement Associate at The Arc of Monroe. If you find the below article useful please consider making a donation so we can create more.

How We Can All Help Glass Children - Arc of Monroe (2024)

FAQs

How We Can All Help Glass Children - Arc of Monroe? ›

We Can Help Glass Children

How can glass child syndrome be prevented? ›

5 Ways to Avoid Creating a Glass Child
  1. Carve out quality one-on-one time with each of them. ...
  2. Help your child understand and feel like part of the team. ...
  3. Ask friends with kids to watch them while you take your child with unique needs to appointments. ...
  4. Support their interests.

How do you comfort a glass child? ›

If you work with parents of a glass child, encourage the following: not take for granted the emotional health of the unaffected child; consider that their child may experience adjustment issues without adult coping mechanisms; be skeptical if the child says they “are fine,” that may not be true; seek to understand the ...

How does being a glass child affect adulthood? ›

Many glass children tend to set higher standards for themselves so as not to burden their already busy parents, Missud said. These feelings in childhood can lead to a desire to overachieve and be hyper-independent in adulthood, she added.

What are the traits of a glass child? ›

Glass Child Syndrome is an anxiety disorder characterized by extreme anxiety, fear, hyperactivity, and an inability to focus. Their behaviors are vastly different from normal children.

How to deal with a glass child? ›

If you are a parent of a glass child, spend quality alone time with them. If you are a friend or extended family, Invite that child over to your house for dinner, take them to a movie, ask them how they are, drive them to counseling, be their friend.

How can you prevent first child syndrome? ›

This can be accomplished by being intentional about what expectations and responsibilities you place on your oldest child, says Smith. “Ideally, the oldest child would be asked to be a role model as a sibling but not a caretaker in the sense of a parent/guardian,” she says.

What is a glass child in psychology? ›

It's an informal term often used to describe the challenges and unique strengths of the siblings of children with chronic illnesses or disabilities. In a TEDx talk, speaker Alicia Arena drew attention to this phenomenon that resonated with so many viewers who grew up with siblings who had special needs: glass children.

How do you know if you were a glass child? ›

One of the major signs of a glass child is that they are conditioned to be problem-free from a young age. This does not mean they are actually problem-free and are not struggling with anything, but all the responsibilities and expectations make them feel like they have to pretend that they are perfect and doing fine.

What is a glass child on TikTok? ›

typically refers to the sibling of someone. that requires extra attention from their parents. The glass refers to the fact that these children. feel invisible to their parents. since all the focus is on the needs of their sibling.

Can you prevent having a special needs child? ›

We know that not all birth defects can be prevented. But, we also know that women can increase their chances of having a healthy baby by managing health conditions and adopting healthy behaviors before becoming pregnant.

How do you prevent golden child syndrome? ›

How to Cope With the Golden Child Syndrome
  1. Awareness. ...
  2. Boost Self-Love and Support in Your Life. ...
  3. Stop Measuring Your Worth By Success. ...
  4. Prioritize Your Needs and Boundaries. ...
  5. Detach From Toxic People. ...
  6. Heal Your Inner Child. ...
  7. Therapy Can Help You, Today!
Sep 29, 2022

How do you overcome the lost child syndrome? ›

The only way to defeat being a lost child is to face your past head-on. That does not mean you will do it alone, like in the past. Therapy means to experience the rage and loneliness you had as a child with someone else who can help you understand your feelings.

Can middle child syndrome be prevented? ›

Put extra effort into your relationship with your middle child. Maybe that relationship is already super-close. But if not, or if you see your middle child struggling, consider that more connection with you might be just what she needs. Be sure that you acknowledge her feelings even when you disagree with them.

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